Reunion and Generations

In a few days from now, it will have been 13 years since I met my first biological relative, my first born daughter. She was the first person in my life that I looked at, and could see parts of me staring back. It was an incredible moment, to feel that bond to another living person. It was primal, it was beautiful, it was things being as they should be.

It smacked me between the eyes in a rather painful fashion when I first reunited with my sister again, that the years lost, the time, the people, they weren't just my losses, they were my children's losses too. This is their family too, not just mine, and they didn't consent to being clipped from the family tree any more than I did. This is their reunion as much as it is mine.

I remember how sharply my daughters watched us all interact during my sister's first visit here. They commented on similarities in looks, mannerisms, and they were so excited about it. They are drinking up everything right along side me. It's fascinating and sad at the same time. Because we shouldn't have to do this, this should have been our birthright from the start.

My sister and I, together, are trying to find our younger half sister. Reunion has definitely changed, and added to my perception of what family is. And I so desperately want to find her. But she's good at staying hidden I suppose. I can only hope that one day we will find her, and my girls will be able to know all their aunts.